转眼，不知怎样一来，整个燕园成了二月兰detianxia。eryuelanshiyizhongchangjiandeyehua。huaduobuda，zibaixiangjian。huaxingheyansedoumeiyoushenmeteyizhichu。ruguozhiyouyiliangke，zaibaihuacongzhong，juebuhuiyinqirenherendezhuyi。danshitaqueyiduozhisheng，meidaochuntian，hefengyichuifu，bianzhankailexiaohua；zuichuzhiyouyiduo，liangduo，jiduo。danshiyizhuanyan，zaiyiyejian，jiunengbianchengbaiduo，qianduo，wanduo。dayoulingjiabaihuazhishangdeshitoule。
wozaiyanyuanliyijingzhulesishiduonian。zuichuwobingmeiyoutebiezhuyidaozheizhongxiaohua。zhidaoqiannian，yexuzhengshieryuelankaihuadedanian，womodifaxian，congwozhudeloupangxiaotushankaishi，zoubianlequanyuan，yanguangsuodaozhichu，wubuyoueryuelanzai。zhaipang，lixia，linzhong，shantou，tupo，hubian，zhiyaoyoukongxidedifang，doushiyituanziqi，jianyibaiwu，xiaohuakaidelinlijinzhi，qishifeifan，ziqizhichongyunxiao，lianyuzhoudoufangfobianchengzisedele。
季羡林先生
wozaimilihuanghuzhong，huranfaxianeryuelanpashangleshu，youdeyijingpashangleshuding，youdezhengzainulipandeng，lianchuanqideshengyinsihudounengtingdao。wozheiyijingkezhenbuxiao：mofeieryuelanzhenchenglejinglema？zaidingjingyikan，yuanlaishilancongzhongyixietengluo，yezhengzaikaizhehua，huadeyansetongeryuelanyimoyiyang，suochadejiujinjinzhiqueshaoneiyituanbaiwu。woshizaijuedewozheigehuanjuefeichangyouqu。daizheqingxingdeyishi，wozixiguanchaqilai：chulehuaxingzhiwai，yansezhenshiyibanwuer。fanzhengwozhidaolezheishiliangzhongzhiwu，xinliyouledi，ranerzaiyizhuanyan，worengrankandaoeryuelanwangzhitoupa。zheishizhendeni？haishihuanjue？yiyoutaquba。
自从意识到二月兰cunzaiyihou，yixietongeryuelanyoulianxidehuiyilijiyongshangxintou。yuanlaihenshaoxiangdaodehuogenbenmeiyouxiangdaodeshiqing，xianzaixiangdaole；yuanlairenweishifenpingchangdesuoshi，xianzaixiandeshifenbupingchangle。woyixiaziqingxidiyishidao，yuanlaizheizhongshifenpingfandeyehuajingzaiwodeshengmingzhongzhanyouzheiyangzhongyaodediwei。wozijiyeyoudianchijingle。
wohuiyidesilvshicongloupangdexiaotushankaishide。zheiyizuoxiaotushan，zuichuhaowujingrenzhichu，zhibuguoersanmigao，shangmianzhangmanleyecao。dangnianwaifengkuangchuishi，meici“dasaoweisheng”，quanlouzhuderendoubeizhaohuanchulaibacao，bushi“lvhua”，ershi“huanghua”。womeicidouzaixinzhonganhenzheixiaoshanyecaozhiduo。houlaibuzhiyouyushenmeyuanyin，bashanduigaoleyiliangmi。zheiyangyilai，shanjiupoyouyidianshanshile。dongtoudecangsong，xitoudecuibo，doufangfohuifuleqingchun，yiniansiji，yuyucongcong，zhongjianyikeyushu，congshulinglaikan，zhinengsuanshisongbodecengsun，raneryezhiganfanmao，gaozhizhiciruyulandeqingkong。
wobujidecongshenmeshihouqiwozhuyidaoxiaoshanshangdeeryuelan。zheizhongyehuakaihuadagaiyeyoudanianxiaonianzhibiede。pengdaoxiaonian，zhizaixiaoshanqianhouxishudikaishangneimejipian。yudaodanian，zeshanqianshanhoukaichengdapian。eryuelanfangfofalekuang。womenchangjiangshenmeshenmehua“nufang”，zheige“nu”ziyongdezhenshiwubidiqimiao。eryuelanyi“nu”，fangfocongtudishenchuxilaiyiguyuanshililiang，yidingyaobahuakaibiandaqianshijie，ziqizhichongyunxiao，lianyuzhoudoufangfobianchengzisedele。dongpodecishuo：“yueyouyinqingyuanque，renyoubeihuanlihe，cishigunanquan。”danshihuamenhaoxiangshimeiyoushenmebeihuanlihe。yinggaikaishi，tamenjiukai；gaixiaoshishi，tamenjiuxiaoshi。tamenshi“zonglangdahuazhong”，yiqieshunqiziran，zijiwusuoweishenmebeiyuxi。wodeeryuelanjiushizheigeyangzi。
二月兰图片
raner，renzheigewanwuzhilingquepianpianyouleganqing，youleganqingjiuyoulebeihuan。zheizhenshiduociyiju，ranermeiyoufazi。renzijiduoqing，youbaqingyidaohua，“leiyanxianghuahuabuyu”，huadangran“buyu”le。ruguohuazhen“yu”qilai，qibuhehuairen！zheixiedaoliwoshifenmingbai。ranerworengranbazijidebeihuanguadaoleeryuelanshang。
当年老祖还活着的时候，每到春天二月兰开花deshihou，tawangwangnayibaxiaochan，daiyigeheishubao，daochengpiandeeryuelanpangqingcaocongliqusouwajicai。zhiyaokandaotadeshenyingzaieryuelandeziwulihuangdong，wojiuzhidaozaiwucanhuowancandecanzhuoshangbiranmimanzhejicaihuntundeqingxiang。dangwanruhaihuozhedeshihou。tameicihuijia，zhiyaoeryuelanzhengzaikaihua，talikaishi，tazongchuanguozuoshoushieryuelandeziwu，youshoushihupanchuiliudelvyan，congcongmangmangzouqu，bawodemuguangyizhidaidaohuduiandeguaiwanchu。dangxiaobaomuyangyinghaizaiwojiashi，tayetongxiaoshanheeryuelanjieshangleyuan。wocengtaosongcixieguosanjuhua：“wujingxielvxunyecai，huanghunbaomaoxiangxiyang，dangshizhidaoshixunchang。”wodexiaomaohuzihemimihaizaishideshihou，woyewangwangzaieryuelanconglikandaotamen：yiheiyibai，zaizisezhonggewaixianyan。
suoyouzheixiesuoshidoushixunchangdaobunengzaixunchangle。raner，cengjiheshi，daolejintian，laozuhewanruyijingyongyuanyongyuandilikailewomen。xiaoyingyehuileshandonglaojia。zhiyuhuzihemimiyegezizunxunmaodeguilv，buzhizuandaoleyanyuanzhongnayigeyouandejiaoluoli，dengdaisiwangdedaolai。laozuhewanrudezou，bawodexindoudaizoule。huzihemimiwoyeyiniannanwang。rujin，tiandisuikuan，yangguangsuizhaoyangpuzhao，woquegandaowubiandejiliaoyuqiliang。huiyizheixiewangshi，ruyunruyan，yuanlaishijinzaiyanqian，rujinquerupenglailingshan，kewangerbukejile。
duiyuwozheiyangdexinqinghewodeyiqiezaoyu，wodeeryuelanyidianyewudongyuzhong，zhaoyangzijikaihua。jinnianyoushieryuelankaihuadedanian。zaixiaoyuanli，yanguangsuodaozhichu，wubuyoueryuelanzai。zhaipang，lixia，linzhong，shantou，tupo，hubian，zhiyaoyoukongxidedifang，doushiyituanziqi，jianyibaiwu，xiaohuakaidelinlijinzhi，qishifeifan。ziqizhichongxiaohan，lianyuzhoudoufangfobianchengzisedele。
这一切都告诉我。二月兰shibuhuibiande，shishicangsang，yutarufuyun。ranerwoqueshizaibiande。yueyuebian，niannianbian。woxiangyibubianyingwanbian，ranerbanbudao。woxiangxuexieryuelan，ranerbanbudao。budanruci，tahaiyingbawodejiyiqianhuidaowoyishengzuidaomeideshihou。zaishinianhaojiezhong，wozijitiaochulaifanduibeidaneiyiwei“laofoye”，beichaojia，beidachengle“fangeming”。zhengshizaieryuelankaihuadeshihou，wobeiguanzhilaodonggaizao。youhenzhangyiduanshijian，womeitiandaoyigedifangqujianpozhuansuiwa，haisuishizhunbeizhebeihongweibingyajiedaoshenmedifangqu“pidou”，zuopenqishi，haiyaoaishangyidunzou，dadebiqinglianzhong。keshizaizhuanwafenglieryuelanyirankaifang，yiranzide，xiaoduichunfeng，haoxiangshizaichaoxiaowo。wodangshizishizaifeichangnanguo。wozhidaozhengyishizaizijishouzhong，keshishifeidiandao，renyaonanfen，wohutiantianbuying，jiaodidibuda，yiqiangyifen，manfuweiqu，haowurenshengzhiqu。zaihenzhangyiduanshijiannei，wochengle“bukejiechuzhe”，jinianmeijiedaoguoyifengxin，henshaoyourengantongwodagezhaohu。wosuichurenshi，shiweiyilei。
然而我一回到家里，老祖、德华她们，在每人每月只能得到恩赐十几元钱生活费的情况下，殚思竭虑，弄一点好吃的东西，希望能给我增加点营养；更重要的恐怕还是，希望能给我境添点生趣。婉如和延宗也尽可能地多回家来。我的小猫憨态可掬，偎依在我的身旁。她们不懂哲学，分不清两类不同性质的矛盾。人视我为异类，她们视我为好友，从来没有表态，要同我划清界限。所有这一些极其平常的琐事，都给我带来了无量的安慰。窗外尽管千里冰封，室内却是暖气融融。我觉得，在世态炎凉中，还有不炎凉者在。这一点暖气支撑着我，走过了人生最艰难的一段路，没有堕入深涧，一直到今天。
二月兰的花朵
woganjuedaobei，youganjuedaohuan。
daolejintian，tianyunzhuandong，foujitailai，buzhizenmeyilai，woyixiazichengwei“jikejiechuzhe”，daochutingdaodeshimeihaodeyanci，daochujiandaodeshiheyuedexiaorong。wocongneixinliganjiwozheixiexinlaopengyou，tamenjueduishizhenchengde。tamengulilewo，tamenqifalewo。raner，yihuidaojiali，suirandehuahaizai，yanzonghaizai，kewodelaozudaonaliquleni？wodewanrudaonaliquleni？haiyouwodehuzihemimiyishidaonaliquleni？shijiesuizhaoyanglanglang，yangguangsuizhaoyangmingmei，woqueganjueyiyangdejimoyuqiliang。
woganjuedaohuan，buganjuedaobei。
wonianjiemaodie，qianmiandeluyouxianle。jinianqian，woxieguoyipianduanwen，jiao《laomao》，yisihenjianming，woyishengyougetedian：buyuanyimafanren。lejiewoderendouchengren。nandaodaolerenshengzuihouyiduanlushangwojiuyaogaibianzheigetedianma？bu，bu，buxianggaibian。wozhenxiangxueyixuelaomao，daoledaxianlailinshi，zuandaoyigeyouandejiaoluoli，yigerenqiaoqiaodilikairenshi。
这话又扯远了。我并不认为眼前就有制定行动计划的必要。我还有很多事情要做，而且我的健康情况也允许我去做。有一位青年朋友说我忘记了自己的年龄。这话极有道理。可我并没有全忘。有一个问题我还想弄弄清楚哩。按说我早已到了“悲欢离合总无情”的年龄，应该超脱一点了。然而在离开这个世界以前，我还有一件心事：我想弄清楚，什么叫“悲”？什么又叫“欢”？是我成为“不可接触者”时悲呢？还是成为“极可接触者”时欢？如果没有老祖和婉如的逝世，这问题本来是一清二白的，现在却是悲欢难以分辨了。我想得到答复。我走上了每天必登临几次的小山，我问苍松，苍松不语；我问翠柏，翠柏不答。我问三十多年来亲眼目睹我这些悲欢离合的二月兰，tayechenmobuyu，wuziwanduonufang，xiaoduichunfeng，ziqizhichongxiaohan。
1993年6月11日写完
